Peace and confusion.

i'm finding my peace. and forgiving myself for those things i've never done.

willy tea taylor 
"cattleman"


I love this quote. I just wish this was true for me. Life is such a rollercoaster. So many ups and downs, back and forths...I wish I could just keep myself consistent. Happy as ever (am I or was I just convincing myself?) and really believing i'm finding peace. Really forgiving myself. Then all of a sudden I feel back to square one again. I feel vulnerable and confused. Am I just having a bad day/week or is this legit? Am I supposed to listen to my gut or is this just a moment of weakness that will soon pass? I have to ask myself these questions a lot lately. I envy those who are that in tune with their emotions and really know who they are and what they want.

There's so many things I miss, so many things I wish I had done differently. Isn't it funny how you can look back and forget all the bad? All of a sudden things were great, things could have been fixed with a snap of a finger. 

Like I said, vulnerable and confused.

So once again, i'll wait it out and see where that gets me. I'll find peace. I'll rid of my regrets. I'll get there, one day. 

Stars.

 

The type of thing that makes your chest tight and your heart hurt.